When a Brother or Sister bother you.

 Saturday, November 19th, Year 3

Morning Meditation

This was part of my morning meditation and it struck a chord with me.  For all the work we put into it, church folk don't seem to get along with each other any better, at times, than the unchurched.  The coarseness that has contaminated our political discourse at all levels has found its way into our pews as well.  To hold a grudge, to take a small issue of offense, and rather than pull it from your garden of thoughts, you dig about it roots, water and fertilize it, you put a fence about that it may grow unencumbered..  When this happens it is like when bacteria make their way past the enamel of a tooth and gain access to vulnerable interior of the tooth and rot and decay sets into the cohesiveness of the congregation.

There are perfectly sound reasons to have an issue with another believer, just as there are many ways to to take offense at something, that truth be told, was only an offense to your ego.  The important thing I have concluded, is that we habitualize the practice of daily examining our relationships with others.  Now I'm talking church here, but this holds just as true in our relationship beyond the sound of the church bell.  Today's advances in technology make it easy to cut someone out of your life - a little Unfriending , a quick visit to your Settings file to throw a few toggles next to their name in your Contact List, and bingo, you have cut that person out of your life.  And it seems soo Christian a thing to do!  Your ego pats you on the back for not muddying the waters of the church and for (once again) putting others ahead of yourself.  What has actually happened here is there are now not one, but two isolated members in the church and the church is not better off for that very reason.

An early Quaker advises a friend on how to handle a conflict between brothers and sisters in the faith.

By Isaac Penington

Dear Friend,

I have heard that thou hast somewhat against W. R. whereupon thou forbearest coming to meetings to his house; which thou oughtest seriously to weigh and consider, that thy path and walking herein may be right and straight before the Lord. Is the thing, or are the things, which thou hast against him, fully so as thou apprehendest? Hast thou seen evil in him, or to break forth from him; and hast thou considered him therein, and dealt with him as if it had been thy own case? Hast thou pitied him, mourned over him, cried to the Lord for him, and in the tender bowels of love and meekness of spirit, laid the thing before him? And if he hath refused to hear thee, hast thou tenderly mentioned it to others, and desired them to go with thee to him; that what is evil and offensive in him might be more weightily and advantageously laid before him, for his humbling, and for his recovery unto that which is a witness and strength against the evil?

If thou thou hast proceeded thus, thou hast proceeded tenderly and orderly, according to the law of brotherly love, and God’s witness in thy conscience will justify thee therein. But if thou hast let in any hardness of spirit, or hard reasonings against him, or hard resolutions, as relating to him, the witness of God will not justify thee in that.

Hast thou pitied him, mourned over him, cried to the Lord for him?

And if at any time hereafter thou hast any thing against others, O learn from that of God in thee to shew bowels of compassion towards them, as the Lord has had pity on thee. And keep to his witness in thy heart. Wait to feel the seed, and to keep thy dwelling therein, that thou mayest abide in the peace and rest thereof, and not depart out of thy habitation, out of the sense of truth; for that will let in temptation upon thee, give the enemy strength against thee, and fill thy soul with anguish and perplexity. So the Lord God of infinite tenderness renew his mercy upon thee, and keep thee in that, wherein his love, life, rest, joy, peace, and unspeakable comfort of his holy spirit (which is able to keep the mind out of all the snares and temptations of that which is unholy) is felt and witnessed, by those who are taught and enabled by him to abide and dwell in that into which he gathered them, and in which he hath pleased to appear unto them.

 This is in the love and tender goodness of the Lord to thee, from thy friend in the truth, and for the truth’s sake,

 Isaac Penington

13th of 10th Month, 1667

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